England v West Indies – as it happened
Preamble Swing bowling is one of life's great mysteries, up there with belly-button fluff (where does it come from?), the opposite sex and . One thing we can say with reasonable certainty, however, is that the ball will move around at Trent Bridge. It's the swinging field of world cricke, and it's also been a killing field for England in recent times: their last three Tests here have been won by an innings and nine runs, 354 runs and 319 runs. The most recent of thos was a devastating rout of India a year ago, which has a case for being the greatest England performance of the last 25 years. (I have a soft spot for the , since you asked.)
The best swing bowler in the world, Jimmy Anderson, has a sensational record here, with 33 wickets at 17.45. Only Alec Bedser has . Stuart Broad gives good Statsguru as well, with 15 wickets at 16.33 on his home ground, including a hat-trick in that India Test. Tim Bresnan also had a wonderful match last year, although he could be replaced by Steven Finn.
The warm weather should sap some life from the pitch and the atmosphere, but you suspect England will enjoy this game more than they did the first Test at Lord's. It used to be that England got a nosebleed when they went 1-0 up in a home series. That was then and this is now.
West Indies have won the toss and will bat first. Darren Sammy says it was a "straightforward" decision on what looks like a very good track. Andrew Strauss says he would also have batted, but he doesn't look like his world has ended.
England are unchanged, so there's still no room for Steven Finn or Graham Onions. West Indies bring in Ravi Rampaul and the offspinner Shane Shillingford for Fidel Edwards and Shannon Gabriel.
England Strauss (c), Cook, Trott, Pietersen, Bell, Bairstow, Prior (wk), Bresnan, Broad, Swann, Anderson.
West Indies Barath, Powell, Edwards, Darren Bravo, Chanderpaul, Samuels, Ramdin (wk), Sammy (c), Rampaul, Roach, Shillingford.
1. Snuggle up in nostalgia's abundant bosom with this . Seven changes for one Test? Never mind a foreign country; the past of English cricket is in a galaxy far, far away.
"Oh Rob," ohrobs Abhinav Ramnarayan. "I try to keep an open mind every time England play.. but you guys do make it hard for us neutrals. A definitive statement that Jimmy Anderson is the best swing bowler in the world is at best a subjective statement."
Of course it's subjective. This is a blog, not a judicial review. But I can't think of a better one. Like many folk, I think Dale Steyn is the best fast bowler in the world and Anderson the best swing bowler. Is that really so outlandish?
1st over: West Indies 0-0 (Barath 0, Powell 0) The best swing bowler in
"Might I start a curmudgeonly OBO debate on the subject of suitable office dress in warm weather," says David Hopkins. "Being a generally miserable sort, I make a point of shunning my office's 'dress-down Friday' tradition, but my colleagues are less professional/petty-minded than me. One of them has taken the opportunity to turn up today looking like an extra from Kevin and Perry Go Large. Is this appropriate, or should it be the basis for summary dismissal?"
A custodial sentence, ideally. People need to watch that level of wackiness, even on a glorious day like today. On that subject, can a gentleman ever legitimately wear short trousers?
2nd over: West Indies 8-0 (Barath 0, Powell 8) Broad, striving for swing, is driven elegantly through the covers for four by Kieran Powell. The next ball is on a good length and finds the edge, but the ball drops short of Strauss at first slip and scoots away like an urchin pickpocket to the boundary. There isn't much pace in this pitch.
"Jimmy's stats throw up an ," says Matt Emerson. "He averages 23.56 when England win compared to 50.44 when they lose. whose averages are 22.79 & 26.81 respectively. It does beg the question; do England lose because Bad Jimmy turns up or does he pack it in because we're losing? I can't believe it's the latter, but it's interesting nonetheless."
Yes that is interesting. I'm never entirely how to read statistics in wins/draws/defeats, but this is pretty striking. It might be skewed by the early part of his career, and of course he bowled sensationally in those defeats in the winter. Any theories? Anyone? Anyone? Fry?
3rd over: West Indies 8-0 (Barath 0, Powell 8) Anderson is moving it both ways, which is always ominous for an opening batsman. Barath is hit on the thigh by a couple of induckers, defends an awayswinger and is then pinned in the vicinity of his foetus facilitator. Lovely bowling.
"What the hell is Botham wearing?" says Rachel Clifton. "Some kind of shiny stripy suit with pale brown suede shoes?" That's preferable to the hotpants/string vest look that half the sports desk are rocking.
WICKET! West Indies 9-1 (Barath c Anderson b Broad 0) The best swing bowler in England/the world is also one of the best fast bowler/fielders in the history of cricket, and he has just taken a stunning catch at third slip. Barath felt for a length delivery from Broad that seamed away and really flew off the edge, and Anderson stuck out his left hand to take a beautiful reflex catch above head height. The slips were in close because of the chance that fell short in Broad's previous over, so the reaction time was almost non existent. He is a pretty special cricketer these days.
4th over: West Indies 10-1 (Powell 9, Edwards 1) Here's a nice statgasm: Stuart Broad's Test average dropped below 30 for the first time with that wicket. "It's a standard jokey theme for people to email in to you to say that they're following the OBO coverage rather than revising," lies Ethan Dean-Richards in an attempt to give his email a context that doesn't actually exist. "But do people actually fail exams because of following OBOs – is there a seedy underbelly to the LOL fun? Because I'm looking for someone to blame in advance of next Friday's events and I'm seeing your name on my screen."
5th over: West Indies 18-1 (Powell 9, Edwards 5) That should have been the second wicket. Edwards edged a good one from Anderson low towards third slip, where Bresnan put down a sharp diving catch to his left. "Get Anderson in there off his bowling," says Mike Atherton on Sky. The ball flew away for four – and so did the next delivery, this time off the boot after Edwards played around an inswinging yorker. There was a big appeal for LBW but it was sliding a long way down the leg side. Edwards has the look of a walking wicket, a name to file alongside those of Vikram Rathore and Gerry Liebenberg.
"Regarding David's email in the first over, wouldn't it be summery dismissal?" sniffs Alexander Netherton. "God, I'm good."
6th over: West Indies 22-1 (Powell 13, Edwards 5) Powell blazes a full delivery from Broad through extra cover for four. That was a nice shot, although England won't mind him driving against the swinging ball.
"Categorically and undeniably NO," says Elizabeth Connor. "Men cannot wear short trousers or socks with sandals. Just no. Thankfully they don't have dress down fridays at my office, no one needs to see their colleagues in casual wear, the experience can be traumatic at best. I've still not recovered from seeing a colleague in a previous job come in wearing short shorts and a satin shirt which was open to mid chest (shudders) no one should suffer that fate."
7th over: West Indies 24-1 (Powell 13, Edwards 7) Edwards leans into a wider delivery from Anderson and drives it nicely through mid off for two. He looked a bit more solid in that over, although you can almost hear his heartbeat from here. This is such a big tour for the West Indies' inexperienced top three. "If I wasn't busy revising," says Ethan Dean-Richards, "I'd search out examples."
8th over: West Indies 26-1 (Powell 15, Edwards 7) A quiet over from Broad is enlivened when Bumble tells the world that a bird deposited something malodorous right on his head while he was enjoying a beer in Nottingham last night. "I believe belly button fluff arises as the hairs around said area rub on your clothes and some of the fibres come off and collect in the neatly-shaped receptacle," says Ali McLaren. "The colour of the fluff should match the colour of the clothes you wear." So what's an elf?
WICKET! West Indies 26-2 (Edwards b Anderson 7) The walking wicket is walking back to the pavilion. It was a beauty from Jimmy Anderson that snapped back off the seam and through the gate to hit the off stump, but it was a grotesquely large gate as Edwards pushed nervously with his bat miles away from the pad. He was a bit late on the shot as well. The poor fella looks a touch out of his depth against the moving ball.
9th over: West Indies 26-2 (Powell 15, Darren Bravo 0) Edwards has made 20 runs in six innings on this tour, and eight in three in the Test series. "I email for little other reason than because I feel cuckolded by your cavorting with another double barreller, so this is my version of going to the gym and cutting out the pies," says Elliot Carr-Barnsley. "I was going to ask what kind of all rounder you would prefer to be a bowling average of 23, batting of 25, or a 33 and 34 man. I was going to , but it turns out he was much better than that. I love Shaun Pollock." To think he often batted at No9. Dear me. But to answer your question, it's not me, it's you. Oh and a 25/23 man all the time.
10th over: West Indies 29-2 (Powell 16, Darren Bravo 2) Bravo punches a drive through mid off to get off the mark. "A gentleman cannot wear shorts unless he is on a beach," says Stewart Todd. "My sensibilities were assaulted this morning by a man on my train clearly wearing a work shirt – fine – but shorts that were frankly better suited to Espana 82 than 2012, work socks and shoes. Now that maybe the finest World Cup of my lifetime, but I only expect to see those shorts on Zico. Not the 7:23 to Charing Cross."
11th over: West Indies 33-2 (Powell 20, Darren Bravo 2) Powell dangles a crooked bat in no-man's land at Anderson, with the resulting inside edge flying past the leg stump for four. England would love to get one more wicket to get Chanderpaul in against the new ball.
"Apparently Michael Vaughan says Stuart Broad could take Botham's English record for Test wickets," says Chris Wright. "What do you reckon?" Unless Broad gives up cricket aged 27 to become a professional belly-button-fluff analyst, he should do it easily, such is the volume of Test cricket these days. Although by the time he becomes England's leading wicket-taker he'll probably be taking Jimmy Anderson's record.
12th over: West Indies 33-2 (Powell 20, Darren Bravo 2) Bresnan comes on for Broad (5-0-19-1) and starts with a maiden, including a good delivery that lifts past the outside edge. "If we're going to discuss belly button fluff, could we please use the correct terminology: 'navel lint'," says
13th over: West Indies 37-2 (Powell 24, Darren Bravo 2) Powell is a bit late on a defensive push at Anderson, and the ball goes to slip on the bounce. The next ball is straighter and clipped crisply through midwicket for four. That's a really nice shot.
14th over: West Indies 42-2 (Powell 28, Darren Bravo 3) Another sparkling cover drive from Powell, this one off Bresnan, brings his sixth boundary. His record is modest but he looks like he might have something about him. "I live in a place where it is 95F and at least 95% humidity (does 100% mean you live in the sea?) every day for months, so I wear shorts all the time," apologises Mac Millings. "Actually, I wear them in the winter, too, because I want to take as many opportunities as possible to disgust people with the sight of my arthritis-swollen knees as they bulge from my pale stick-legs. On the other hand, I'm not a gentleman; another reason why this entire email was a waste of time."
WICKET! West Indies 42-3 (Darren Bravo c Swann b Anderson 3) A change does the job for Jimmy Anderson. He switched around the wicket to Bravo and struck with his first ball. It was full, wide and tempted Bravo into a lazy drive that flew off the edge to second slip, where Swann took a sharp catch.
15th over: West Indies 46-3 (Powell 28, Chanderpaul 0) Anderson surprises Chanderpaul with an excellent short ball first up that flies off the armguard and over the keeper's head for four leg byes. He is bowling masterfully and has figures of 8-4-14-2. "Navel lint," says Harry Wassell. "Mine stinks. Usually blue." I'd forgotten about the smell; it's disgusting. Is there a reason for that, beyond the obvious.
16th over: West Indies 50-3 (Powell 32, Chanderpaul 0) Powell has known the whereabouts of his off stump all morning, showing excellent judgement of what to leave. That forces Bresnan to straighten his line – and that allows Powell to crunch him authoritatively through midwicket for four. "I followed OBO throughout my MA and did fairly well," says Eleanor Ward, "so maybe OBO coverage actually works as a reliable study aid?" Was your MA in Wretched Live Blogs?
17th over: West Indies 58-3 (Powell 32, Chanderpaul 8) Chanderpaul pushes Anderson through the covers for four with the aid of a misfield from Cook, who went down like an arthritic octogenarian trying to tie his shoelaces. And that should have been out! Chanderpaul edged Anderson right between second and third slip for four. Anderson screams with disgust. It was dying on Swann and Bresnan, but that should have been taken. They put each other off, and Bresnan instinctively stopped the movement oif his right hand.
"So, Carr-Barnsley's not sure whether it's better to be a 23/25 or a 33/34?" says Rob Marriott. "Well, frankly, who'd want to be a 33/34, when there's a 32/57 on his way to bother England later in the summer? Regards, Rob Marriott-Marriott."
18th over: West Indies 63-3 (Powell 33, Chanderpaul 12) Another escape, this time for Powell. He pulled a sharp, straight bouncer from Bresnan that swirled high in the air. Strauss, running back from slip, just couldn't get there. Chanderpaul survives a huge LBW shout next ball. He walked a long way across and it was probably missing off stump. England considered a review – purely because it's Chanderpaul – but then decide against it. Rightly so because it pitched outside leg and was missing off by a distance. Chanderpaul touches the next ball off the pads for four.
WICKET! West Indies 63-4 (Powell c Anderson b Broad 33) It's the Broad and Anderson show yet again. Broad replaces Anderson and strikes with his second ball. Powell drove loosely at a good delivery that moved away a touch off the seam, and Anderson took a smart catch by his left ankle. Actually it wasn't the cleanest catch – it slipped through his hands but he was able to wedge it against his body. Anderson has taken two and caught two this morning. He's a different kind of allrounder.
19th over: West Indies 64-4 (Chanderpaul 12, Samuels 1) Chanderpaul is down on his back after being struck in the foetus facilitator by Broad. He's in considerable pain. Who'd be a physio? Chanderpaul eventually resumes and is struck on the hip by a good delivery from Broad. "Never mind wearing short trousers," says Will Parsons. "The humidity under my desk is creating such a swelter that I'm contemplating slipping on a floaty skirt."
REVIEW! West Indies 64-4 (Samuels not out 1) Tim Bresnan helps himself to some candy – or does he? Samuels, up on his toes, pushes around a straight delivery that hits the pad, and Asad Rauf gives him out LBW. Samuels decides to review, however, and Hawkeye shows it was bouncing over the stumps.
20th over: West Indies 64-4 (Chanderpaul 12, Samuels 1) Bresnan might feel the world is against him after his unlucky performance at Lord's, and now this. He's extremely tough mentally, however, so I doubt it'll bother him. Later in the over Samuels has to jump out the way of an excellent bouncer. That was a fine over.
"In response to Ethan Dean-Richards, I tend to follow the OBO while listening to students taking oral exams and then I realise that I haven't heard a word they've been saying and so I pass them regardless," says Robin Hazlehurst. "I feel that this helps to balance out the students who have failed because of OBOing instead of revising."
21st over: West Indies 68-4 (Chanderpaul 16, Samuels 1) Chanderpaul edges a wide half-volley from Broad along the ground and wide of the slips for four. The next ball is pulled round the corner and well fielded by Bell, who is in at leg gully, and then there's a strangled LBW shout because of a big inside edge. "I'm not sure about this whole 'gentlemen don't wear shorts' hoopla," says Guy Hornsby. "I like some satorial nip and tuck like the next man, and I wear a suit for work, but what's the point of wilfully wearing clothes that are hot, sticky and uncomfortable. It's bad enough having to use the tube in trousers and a shirt in the weekday. Girls have it easy, fanning themselves while the poor lambs wear a vest and skirt. My heart bleeds. But there are rules. For an Englishman, Hawaiian shorts are NEVER excusable. Ever. Shirts I won't criticise, if only for a certain man named Steve, formerly of this parish. Aaaah, those Ashes 2010-11 days. Sigh."
22nd over: West Indies 68-4 (Chanderpaul 16, Samuels 1) Samuels, lunging at the ball like a drunk struggling towards the bar at last orders, is beaten by a good full delivery from Bresnan. He's giving Samuels an expert working-over here; it's another maiden. "Short trousers - yes, long shorts are okay if at least vaguely tailored and footwear is offered considerable, err, consideration," says Sarah Morriss. "Now, how little can I get away with wearing under my labcoat? It's BOILING in here today." I suppose it depends what type of arthouse movie you're filming.
23rd over: West Indies 72-4 (Chanderpaul 19, Samuels 2) Samuels is beaten once again, this time by a cracking lifter from Broad. In other news, here's Tim Sanders on the subject of great fast bowler/fielders. "Please can I put forward Keith Boyce, of Barbados, Essex and West Indies," says Tim. "He tends to be overshadowed by the very fast bowlers that followed, but he was a fantastic all-rounder, key to the West Indies series win over here in 1973 and the first World Cup win in 1975. I once saw him take a catch that would've been six runs to a mere mortal fielder, sprinting round the boundary at Ilford, then what seemed an effortless leap to take the ball one-handed. Brings a mistiness to the eyes of a 50-year old cricket-lover."
24th over: West Indies 73-4 (Chanderpaul 20, Samuels 3)
25th over: West Indies 74-4 (Chanderpaul 19, Samuels 4) Samuels has put any fancy ideas about scoring runs on the backburner and is basically batting for lunch, although he does work the last ball of Broad's over off the pads for a single. "If it isn't acceptable to wear shorts in the office," says Ben Monk, "surely leaving your flies open to allow a breeze to circulate is fine?" I suppose it depends what type of arthouse movie you're filming.
26th over: West Indies 79-4 (Chanderpaul 19, Samuels 9) Graeme Swann comes on for an over before lunch. He has never taken a Test wicket here – although, as Mike Atherton points out on Sky, that's mainly because he hasn't had much bowling to do. Just 17 overs in two Tests. He has a silly point and slip for Samuels, who drives the second ball pleasantly through extra cover for four. "I'm wearing shorts," says Mike Selvey. "So there." Here's an exclusive picture of the Trent Bridge pressbox.
27th over: West Indies 84-4 (Chanderpaul 19, Samuels 14) Broad is bowling full and straight to Samuels, who does tend to fall over at the crease. When he pulls his length back later in the over, Samuels shovels it to fine leg for four. And that, my little harem, is lunch. It's been a good morning for England, particularly the exceptional pair of Jimmy Anderson and Stuart Broad. But the dead, dead bat of the dead, dead good Shivnarine Chanderpaul still lies in their way. See you in half an hour for the afternoon session.
"Bit of lunchtime reading for the troops..." says Scott Oliver. "Want to know what Greame Swann's darts nickname would be? Or the five ingredients of his 'desert island salad'? Or his signature dish? Or which Premier League footballer he considers his equivalent? "
Pictures > words. Possibly. .
28th over: West Indies 86-4 (Chanderpaul 19, Samuels 16)
29th over: West Indies 87-4 (Chanderpaul 20, Samuels 16)
"Am I alone in expressing scepticism that Sarah Morriss is a genuine person?" says Ed Wilson. "From my (ahem) experience of research scientists, the 'hotpants and labcoats' sort tend to be few and far between. At least outside the confines of redtube. Or maybe I went to the wrong university. For the record, I am a pink chino shorts kind of man. Not that it was ever in doubt."
30th over: West Indies 87-4 (Chanderpaul 20, Samuels 16)
31st over: West Indies 87-4 (Chanderpaul 20, Samuels 16) I missed that Anderson over while quietly wishing illwill on my frozen computer, but I can say it was a maiden to Samuels. I can say that.
32nd over: West Indies 87-4 (Chanderpaul 20, Samuels 16) After a fairly rapid start to his innings, Chanderpaul is bedding in for a long one. He leaves a number of deliveries from Broad in that over, the third consecutive maiden.
"Actually, it doesn't much matter if they get Shiv out or not as long as they roll the others over," says legs model and part-time cricket writer Mike Selvey. "Shiv will survive but he won't take the game away from you." Yeah that's a very good point. He's not like Lara, who could score 180 off 220 balls in a total of 340.
33rd over: West Indies 87-4 (Chanderpaul 20, Samuels 16)
34th over: West Indies 89-4 (Chanderpaul 22, Samuels 16) Tino Best wanders round the outfield to hearty shouts of ''. " Chanderpaul pulls Broad for two, the first runs for a long, long time. Broad fingertips a drive onto the stumps at the bowler's end, but Samuels had not backed up too far. "I've always thought if you're going to go with shorts, then it has to be in an offensive, go-the-whole-hog sort of way," says Tom Collins. "Maybe this is the influence of my dad, who on holiday used to couple a lurid pink short-sleeved shirt with orange and black shorts that some kind of Egyptian hieroglyphics-style pattern. And a bumbag, obviously."
35th over: West Indies 91-4 (Chanderpaul 22, Samuels 18) Samuels is straddling the line between responsibility and strokelessness. After 21 balls without a run, he flicks Anderson confidently through midwicket for two.
36th over: West Indies 91-4 (Chanderpaul 22, Samuels 18) Swann replaces Broad and should settle into a spell now. He starts with another maiden to Chanderpaul, who is playing with the otherworldly certainty.
37th over: West Indies 91-4 (Chanderpaul 22, Samuels 18) Anderson goes around the wicket to the right-handed Samuels. We don't see him do this very often. It causes problems for Samuels, however. He doesn't have his angles right at first and is beaten a couple of times, fishing needlessly in the foyer of anxiety.
"I seem to remember Gus Fraser and Peter Such bowling 10 consecutive maidens against Australia, probably in 93," says Chris Evans. "Did that really happen?" It's not inconceivable, as maidens were much more common back then, although from memory the only Test they played together that summer was at The Oval, and that was a fast-scoring game. It could happen though. At one stage during the fourth Test against SA in 1995-96, Peter Martin had figures of 7-7-0-2
38th over: West Indies 92-4 (Chanderpaul 23, Samuels 18) Chanderpaul is beaten by a peach from Swann that draws him forward and kicks past the edge. "Forget men wearing shorts, there was a man on the bus just now who forgot to put on a shirt," says Victoria Ashton. "If I have to wear shoes then the least everyone else can do is not leave the house half naked." Unless you're Tyler Durden in an underground boxing arena, you'd better have a pretty good excuse for being topless.
39th over: West Indies 98-4 (Chanderpaul 29, Samuels 18) Chanderpaul wafts Anderson through the covers for four. In the film Kissing Jessica Stein, the main characters talk a lot about men who are "sexy ugly". Chanderpaul is sexiest ugliest batsman around – he is utterly disgusting to watch, but you can't fail to be wowed by the number of runs he scores. Anderosn doesn't seem to be much of a fan. He tries to wind Chanderpaul up with a bit of sledging/banter/abuse. Chanderpaul completely ignores him. Not interested!
40th over: West Indies 107-4 (Chanderpaul 33, Samuels 23) Samuels plays a gorgeous inside-out drive for four off Swann, who responds with a flighted jaffa that takes the inside edge and lands safely. Samuels was down the track so without that edge he would have been stumped, or bowled. Chanderpaul completes an expensive over by rocking back to shovel four more through midwicket.
"God I miss Lara," says Gary Naylor. "Is he the most missed cricketer of all? I quite miss Imran's imperious gaze even after all these years and I know we both miss The Judge. I miss Graeme Smith too – but I'll just have to aim a bit better." I miss Stephen Rodger Waugh. Clearly there's some psychorubble at play here, but part of me loved it when England were Rodgered.
41st over: West Indies 107-4 (Chanderpaul 33, Samuels 23) Bresnan's on for Anderson, who has lovely figures of 15-7-31-2. This is Bresnan's time. The ball is old, the batsmen are set, the pitch is flat and the yakka is hard. And he loves it. He starts with a maiden to Samuels.
"Such and Fraser's spell of maidens was against New Zealand, 1994. ," says Alan White, the subject of whose email was 'Depressingly nerdy email'. Don't worry mate, we're in this together.
42nd over: West Indies 107-4 (Chanderpaul 33, Samuels 23) A maiden from Swann to Chanderpaul. I don't know what else to say. It's not you, it's them. Meanwhile, 'hotpants in science' is the promising subject of Clare Stewart's email. "A quick survey of the lab I work in does include one person in a labcoat and hotpants, although the preferred option seems to be labcoat plus floaty summer dress. Standard attire for chaps is below-the-knee shorts and sandles (no socks – not all scientists are geeks!)." There's nothing like a pair of hotpants to shatter a long-standing stereotype.
43rd over: West Indies 112-4 (Chanderpaul 37, Samuels 24) Chanderpaul slaps Bresnan in the air but wide of the diving Anderson at gully and away for four. "I keep thinking I've lost my connection, as the score stays the same," says Sara Torvalds. "I don't mind the lack of runs, mind, but I'm quite ready for a wicket. Preferably Shiv's." Oh that's just the fat fingers.
44th over: West Indies 116-4 (Chanderpaul 37, Samuels 28) Samuels skids back in his crease to cut Swann decisively for four. He looks confident and light on his feet against Swann. Those runs bring up the fifty partnership. !
45th over: West Indies 125-4 (Chanderpaul 46, Samuels 28) Chanderpaul is doing it again. Bresnan is a touch too straight and crunched through midwicket for four. Three balls later Chanderpaul pings a drive through extra cover for four more. He bats with such admirable economy, and he is just four away for yet another half-century.
"Afternoon Smyth, afternoon everybody," says Josh Robinson. "The Professor of Physics I saw at lunch was in sandals and socks. Quite a lot of linen on show from the humanities lecturers, though, and one straw hat. Oh, and a single pair of dungarees." Is it cowardly to pray for rain just so people start dressing like adults?
WICKET! West Indies 125-5 (Chanderpaul LBW b Swann 46) England have to review this. They have to review it because it's Chanderpaul. He missed a beauty from Swann that hit the back pad and prompted a huge LBW shout. Matt Prior was leaping up and down, imploring Asad Rauf to give it. He didn't, but Andrew Strauss went for the review. This is really close. Was it too high? No it wasn't – Chanderpaul is out! Swann gets his first Test wicket at Trent Bridge. It was a wonderful delivery that drifted onto off stump and then straightened sharply to beat Chanderpaul's defensive push on the outside.
46th over: West Indies 127-5 (Samuels 29, Ramdin 1) "Sandals? In the lab? What sort of slack health and safety standards are these?" fumes Sarah Morriss. "The lucky bastards."
47th over: West Indies 135-5 (Samuels 33, Ramdin 1) How will Samuels react to being alone on the burning deck? He has played really well since lunch and gets four more with a deliberate steer to third man off Bresnan, who then swings a short ball miles down the leg side for four byes. "I understand that there should of course be limits on exposing flesh, but I am a little perturbed my Holly Gan's phobia (28th over)," says Peter Berlin. "Why is she so disturbed by men's legs? What about men's arms or women's legs? Of course, with legs as shapely as mine there is no question of causing suffering."
48th over: West Indies 135-5 (Samuels 33, Ramdin 1) A maiden from Swann to Ramdin. "As Ed Wilson (Over 29)'s brother, and a research scientist to boot, I can confirm that his experience of research scientists is indeed limited to me, and I have long moved on from my hotpant phase," says Charlie Wilson. "If, however, he were ever to leave his cosy Clapham existence and take the time to come and visit his brother in the cricketing wilderness of France, he might be pleasantly surprised by the scientists. He will, however, be swiftly guillotined if he brings the pink shorts." I really don't see the problem.
WICKET! West Indies 136-6 (Ramdin b Bresnan 1) Tim Bresnan gets his candy this time, and there's not a review system in the world that can stop him. Ramdin is cleaned up by a delivery that jags back sharply and maybe keeps low. Actually, I'm not sure it did keep low – Shane Warne reckons he was just beaten for pace and it looks that way on the replay.
49th over: West Indies 136-6 (Samuels 34, Sammy 0) "Is it your new policy to never describe a West Indian wicket?" says a man called General Bretch. "The number of times there's a moment of drama (normally a review), I wait for the update and the update doesn't refer to it all is amazing. I think sometimes you forget that we're not watching it on Sky like you are. Get it together Smyth."
Ah, this old thing. There's a problem with the auto-refresh; you have to press F5 to get full descriptions of the wickets. Sorry. When I am king this will be first on the IT to-do list. I'm not the king. I don't assume you are watching Sky. I am stupid – a desperately thick man, in truth – but I am just about aware that most people are reading this because they can't watch or listen to it.
50th over: West Indies 140-6 (Samuels 38, Sammy 0) Broad replaces Swann and has a fairly big LBW shout first ball when Samuels offers no shot. It was too high and missing off stump. Samuels drives classily for four later in the over.
"Every time my fiancée sees Tim Bresnan on screen, she asks if he's the man ," says Matt Turland. "The sole reason I'm marrying her." Yep, you can close the book on Best Line of 2012. Absolutely wonderful.
51st over: West Indies 144-6 (Samuels 38, Sammy 4) Tim Bresnan comes in to bowl to a chant of "You fat bastard!" Seriously, although I'm sure the chants weren't directed at him. Perhaps Barry Bethall is walking round the outfield. Sammy, who has a lot of talent for a No8, gets off the mark with a flick through square leg for four.
"Talking of nicknames, as I'm sure you were several overs ago (and if not, why not?), my favourite of the current crop is that reserved for Broad," says Paul Howarth. "'Come on, Britsa!'" That's quite good, almost up there with the former Oldham footballer 'One Size' Fitz Hall.
52nd over: West Indies 147-6 (Samuels 39, Sammy 6)
53rd over: West Indies 147-6 (Samuels 39, Sammy 6) Anderson gives Bresnan (13-4-38-1) a break, with England one wicket away from the tail. Samuels is still playing watchfully, batting time rather than runs. Anderson dumps him on his backside with a beautiful
54th over: West Indies 147-6 (Samuels 39, Sammy 6) Sammy loses sight of a slower bouncer from Broad that almost hits the back of the bat. Sammy generally likes to play his shots but with 10 minutes to tea he seems content to see out the session. It's a maiden. "I never, ever wear shorts," says Nick Law. "I merely suffer in grim silence as the temperature builds in my trousers. This however, is not down to a bristling sense of gentlemanly etiquette but more the fact that my legs are thin, white (obviously) and best described as 'incapable of stopping a pig in an alleyway'."
55th over: West Indies 147-6 (Samuels 39, Sammy 6) Guess the number of runs in that Anderson over. Yes, it was a maiden. No, there isn't a prize. Anderson's figures are 17-9-31-2. Those are Curtly Ambrose figures.
56th over: West Indies 153-6 (Samuels 40, Sammy 11) Sammy pushes Broad through mid off for four; then Samuels is beaten, chasing an awayseamer. One more over till tea.
57th over: West Indies 154-6 (Samuels 41, Sammy 11) Sammy is actually the , if you have a qualification of 500 runs. Jonathan Trott comes on for the last over before tea. It's a harmless affair, and that's the end of another good session for England. They only took two wickets, but one of them – that of Shivnarine Chanderpaul – was worth three or four common-or-garden wickets. Thanks for all your emails. Rob Bagchi will be here for the evening session – he's on [email protected].
TEA Afternoon. I feel like I've wandered into Ask Smyth where readers ask the sartorial sage if their duds pass muster. I have nothing to add, apart from some advice given by Emily Post in her book Etiquette, published in 1922.
We've got 33 overs to go in this final session. England have been magnificent, Marlon Samuels obdurate in his new incarnation of Azhar Ali.
Here's an email from Michael Avery: "Looking at that picture you're showing of Broad, I can't help but think he's trying to impersonate his namesake Stuart Goddard during his dandy highwayman phase. Reckon Broad might be a fan of the art-punk-turned-New-Romantic legend. No doubt he has strong feelings about the re-mastering of Dirk Wears White Sox and has the overwhelming urge to sing 'Ant Rap' in the shower." He is indeed known to urge Graeme Swann to leapfog the dog and brush me daddio.
More on the hot topic of the day, shorts, which, incidentally, my late father, who was born in India, referred to scathingly as 'half-pants'. This from Richard Mansell, with impeccable logic: "You've missed out on a fascinating discussion about shorts (short trousers). Many have said that they don't wear shorts or don't like others to because of white legs. This becomes self-perpetuating: if one never wears shorts, then one's legs remain pale and unsightly. At some point, one must take the plunge, disrobe, and expose one's pale lower limbs to the sun, to attain a modicum of colour and make further shorts wearing more acceptable."
Alistair M, won't be convinced. He writes: "I am doing my first triathlon tomorrow. At 38 I think I am doing well to even take part. I went to the triathlon shop and they sell very tight lycra shorts which have a practical benefit of drying quickly after the swim but look ridiculous on anyone over 23 who doesn't have the physique of a Greek god. The matching top made me look like Rab C Nesbitt and at £60 I gave it a miss. I will have to cycle fast just to avoid being ridiculed." Never try anything on, Alistair. It just isn't done.
58th over: West Indies 164-6 (Samuels 50, Sammy 12) Don't forget to F5 for wicket/review descriptions before you bombard me with your Jeremy Hunt emails. As it's not football where fury rules mots other emotions, that should read email. Bresnan to Samuels who hits him gloriously on the up through cover off the back foot for four. Wow. That was Dessie Haynes. He liked it so much he did it again but Bairstow, diving at point, killed its progress to the boundary. Sammy takes a single to midwicket off the quickets ball of the over. It was straight and he just deadbatted it. Off the last ball Samuels moves to 50 with a carbon copy of his backfoot drive through cover point. Three glorious shots from him thyis over. "Pass on my condolences to Naylor," writes Ian Copestake. "It's his birthday today." How many bumps, Gary?
59th over: West Indies 165-6 (Samuels 50, Sammy 13) Swann to Sammy and his third ball, after two blocks is a peach, drifting in then going straight which Sammy manages to prod down to slip with the outside quarter of his bat, playing down the wrong line. "Emily's a bit outdated now," says John Starbuck. "Socks should match the trousers, not the tie and hanky. Besides, the tie is on the way out, which in some ways is a pity, but in an era of changing attitudes towards global warming and superfluous display, is only to be expected. You very rarely see cricketers using them as belts, even." And this sartorial/health advice from Janet Stevens: "Stay covered and help get the skin cancer figures down. Seriously." One off the over.
60th over: West Indies 170-6 (Samuels 51, Sammy 16) Bresnan gets one to cut back into Sammy and lift so the captain narrowly avoided a box bullseye. As Nasser Hussain says, he gets his front leg so far across that he leaves himself vulnerable to being squared up and "nicking off". Nicking off always meant to me necking your last pint and leaving the other drinkers stood there nursing theirs as you made a swift and unheralded exit. Four come off the bat with truncated drives and pushes. The ball is then thrown to Jonathan Trott to take the next over.
61st over: West Indies 175-6 (Samuels 52, Sammy 20) "Somewhat disappointingly, for me, I have never been able to carry off shorts due to my unusual physique." wails Tom Van de Gucht. "Somehow I've been blessed with a torso that is shaped like a Weetabix, it's short and rectangular and emphasises my long froglike legs, which my girlfriend says look like golf clubs." Which ones, Sunningdale? Royal Port Rush? Here comes Trott's half-trackers, trying to force the batsmen back then tempting them with a drive and the fifth is duly pitched up, doesn't move and Sammy belts it uppsihly between cover and mid-off for four.
62nd over: West Indies 176-6 (Samuels 53, Sammy 20) Swann changes ends and comes around the wicket to Samuels with a slip and a short leg. He's using the breeze to drift it in from the wide angle on to middle and off. Samuels uses his feet to turn him to midwicket. Swann comes back over for Sammy who plays him out with a straight bat. "Why do socks have to match?" asks Philip Keegan. "Come to think of it, why do shoes have to match?" Ask Ray Illingworth, Philip, who once went berserk at David Gower for turning up to Grace Road in odd shoes.
63rd over: West Indies 179-6 (Samuels 55, Sammy 21) Bresnan resumes after end-changer Trott made his brief cameo. Samuels takes one off the first ball, Sammy itches to drive, reaching for it slightly but finds the middle of his bat. The fourth ball snakes in low devilishly, with a hint of reverse, but Sammy is watchful and plays it out well. "Those condolences are welcome," writes Gary Naylor. "No bumps (well, not without a forklift truck
64th over: West Indies 184-6 (Samuels 60, Sammy 21) Swann overpitches outside offstump and Samuels, imperiously, strokes it through point for four. What a graceful shot. Remarkably fast hands. But after some parrying Swann's fourth ball drifts a little wider and Samuels is forced to take his bottom hand off the bat to keep it down. A strangled appeal for lbw greets the last ball but it didn't even come within 18 inches of the pad.
65th over: West Indies 194-6 (Samuels 70, Sammy 21) Samuels reads Bresnan's slower ball and creams it through the covers and undere the diving Bell for four. He doews it again off a quicker ball, Bairstow crashing into the hoardings shoulder-first to save two on the rope. "In relation to nothing," writes James Hobbs with a winning opening remark, "my favourite cricket-related cryptic crossword clue (in fact the only one I know) is 'Fifty-one in six balls. Who could ask for more?' (6).Does anyone know any others?" This is gettinge xpensive bnow, from Bresnan. Pietersen owning up immediately that his hand touched the rope when returning Samuels' steer.
66th over: West Indies 194-6 (Samuels 70, Sammy 21) Empire news from John Perry: "When I first went to Hong Kong in 1976, I was surprised to see policemen wearing shoes and knee-length thick navy socks with their khaki uniforms. In fact it keeps you cool. Similarly, in South Africa we used to wear long socks (and shoes) with our safari suits. What does look bad with shorts though is wearing a tie." Of course. That's what kerchiefs and woggles were invented for. Swann perseveres over the wicket to Sammy. This pair have put on 58. The sun is shining. Shades are everywhere in the field. When John Emburey took to wearing sunglasses on the West Indies tour in 1981, it was such an oddity that he was referred to as King Farouk by press corps wags. Swann ties up Sammy with a maiden.
67th over: West Indies 199-6 (Samuels 71, Sammy 25) Chin music ahoy, or an elaborate trick as Bresnan posts deep point and deep squre leg as he comes round the wicket to Samuels. His first two are well pitched up and the batsman digs them out. He bans the third one in but Samuels ducks it and the angle took it well wide of off-stump. "The last time there was sartorial chat on here (about cardigans I believe) Hadley Freeman of Ask Hadley fame joined the conversation," writes Niall Mullen. "It was a rare moment of glamour on the OBO but guess she has better things to be doing today than following the great short trouser debate." She wouldn't approve of the ones I'm wearing, more Baden Powell than Mark Powell. Lovely, classy on-drive from Sammy takes four off the last ball. It raced to the boundary as the captain held his pose in the followthrough.
68th over: West Indies 204-6 (Samuels 73, Sammy 28) The 200 goes up with this pair looking very settled. The answer, writes, Jim Lynch, a Lionel Bartist "is, of course, OLIVER."
69th over: West Indies 210-6 (Samuels 79, Sammy 28) Can Samuels hook? Yes, and he can roll his wrists, smacking a nipple-high delivery from Bresnan behind square for four. "Re: Crossword clues," writes Andrew Jewell. "Athletics camp set out in sports programme (4,5,7)." Bresnan tries another bouncer, this time Samuels swishes and misses and then gets an inside edge when driving and scampers two. "The only outfit that was truly bizarre to comprehend was the British Army insisting that every one wear red in all climates," says Andrew Dennett. "Though I will admit the pith helmet did look jaunty and should make a comeback." Who are you, Don Estelle's milliner?
70th over: West Indies 212-6 (Samuels 80, Sammy 29) Sammy almost chucks it away, his eyes wide when Swann tosses one up. He smashes it a mile into the air, leaning back, but the ball finally falls to earth between the fielders, ten yards in from the rope between midwicket and long on. Samuels, perhaps to calm the skipper down, refuses the easy second run and takes the strike himself and gets one off another one that's flighted up, begging a skip down the wicket. He is more measured though, and punches it to mid-off.
71st over: West Indies 214-6 (Samuels 81, Sammy 29) Jimmy Anderson takes an age to shake himself loose, surprised that the captain has brought him on so close and yet so far from the new ball. He comes round the wicket and has the same field Bresnan had with men out on the hook. Perhaps he should try replicating from Rob Smyth, just for shock value. Decent over.
72nd over: West Indies 221-6 (Samuels 81, Sammy 36) Sammy does repeats what he did off the first ball of Swann's last over. It catches the outside edge but his timing is so glorious it sails for six over long off regardless. Did you really think Hadley had forsaken us? Here she is with her take on Smyth's shorts debate:
73rd over: West Indies 224-6 (Samuels 82, Sammy 37) Shane Warne is coveting a child's ice cream but ideally would prefer "a double dip choc with flakes". "Brown sauce?" asks Bumble before correcting it to "chocolate sauce". Brown sauce. Lancashire sauce. The man's obsessed with condiments. "Well that's easy," writes Selve of the crossword clue. "Test Match Special." Drinks are being taken, says he formally. "Evening Rob," writes Clare Davies. "I have a habit of misreading things (everywhere, not just on the OBO) but just had a very weird one happen. I admit to be multi-tasking today what with the Giro and some IPL to follow, plus Leveson, so am justifiably stressed. However misreading 'replicating this gem from Rob Smyth' as 'this poem' from Rob Smyth is rich, and confusing even by my standards. A poem by Smyth? I wonder what it would be?" Evidently Chickentown.
74th over: West Indies 230-6 (Samuels 83, Sammy 42) Josh Robinson is full of praise for Andrew Jewell's anagram. Then adds this: "I've always thought of myself as a fairly two-eyed cricket-follower (as well as a no-eyed follower of matters sartorial). But there's nothing like having tickets for Monday to extinguish almost all desire that West Indian wickets fall, and to be able to find joy in a stubborn partnership." And while they're still supping, here's the birthday boy's views on the trouser debate: "I used to enjoy wearing tailored shorts in earth tones and would sometime team them with braces, although I did worry that it was dangerously close to a Tomorrow Belongs To Me' Nazi chic. But that was in the 80s - and Fings Ain't What They Used To Be, after all." Were you in A Certain Ratio, Gary? After a long slurp play resumes and Sammy leans back and pummels Swann through the covers for four. He's playing very stylishly and not half as erratically as he did at times against Australia. After walking a single, Samuels plays the same shot as Sammy, leaning back and hitting uppishly but his cover punch is stopped.
75th over: West Indies 230-6 (Samuels 84, Sammy 43) So, Jimmy's being rested for the new ball and Trott is given another trundle, bowling a woeful long hop with his first ball which Samuels pats down to midwicket for a single. Put Pietersen on. He can bowl as many pies as Trott but sometimes, sometimes it works. Sammy looks keen to gorge on Trott's fayre but reins himself in and takes only one. "I've been taught the meaning of hubris today," writes David Hopkins whose fault all this is. "Having initiated the great short trousers in the office debate, I was naturally thrilled to find that the OBO community shared my curmudgeonly views. And so, when Niall Mullen mentioned Hadley's previous OBO, I sensed the chance to confirm my sartorial wisdom, so 'tweeted' her to ask her to take part. 'Not just on the money fashion-wise', I thought to myself, 'but making use of cutting edge social networking'. So what happened then? Hadley, in one fell yet elegant swoop, confirmed that I was in fact wrong, as usual. I'm off to buy some shorts and deck shoes."
76th over: West Indies 239-6 (Samuels 84, Sammy 50) Sumptuous cover drive for four by Sammy brings up the century partnership. He can really play. Screw the nut, as they say, and iron out the rashness and he could bat at No6. He moves to 50 with a single then Swann and Prior appeal for lbw when Samuels comes only half-forward and is struck pad-first as his bat comes down fractionally late. They ponder a review but it would have been umpire's call, clipping only the outside of off-stump.
77th over: West Indies 246-6 (Samuels 86, Sammy 55) Ridiculous, ugly duckling of a shot by Sammy off Trott, a sort of uppish hoicked outside-in drive through midwicket from outside off stump brings him four and tuts from Michael Holding. He does it again, but toes it for a single. Samuels gets out his milking stool, takes one. "All this sartorial chat about shorts is pure piffle," writes Martin Duckworth, or "the accused" as he will be known from today. "I jogged in to work this morning in a 70s running shorts and string vest combo and no-one in the office batted an eyelid. Alas, unbeknownst to me, I had 'popped out' due to the underpants lining of the shorts having perished and it wasn't long before I was escorted off the premises."
78th over: West Indies 247-6 (Samuels 86, Sammy 56) Swann is now attacking Sammy from around the wicket and his quicker ball catches the edge of a foothold and squeezes between the captain's bat and pad. Cue huge agonised cry.
79th over: West Indies 257-6 (Samuels 87, Sammy 65) Utter filth from Trott. See me. Too wide to tempt Sammy with his second ball but then he gets closer so the batsman cuts him for four. A pair of smacked back-foot shots find the field to give each batsman a single and Sammy ends the over with a powerful bottom-hand drive through mid on for four and his highest Test score.
80th over: West Indies 260-6 (Samuels 89, Sammy 66) The last before the new ball. Bowled by Swann. Both batsmen use their feet to stroke it for singles to deep mid-on but he gets Sammy fishing outside off-sump with his arm ball and is this … far from the edge.
81st over: West Indies 260-6 (Samuels 89, Sammy 66) Anderson takes the new ball and swings it almost immediately. Big, sustained, leaping appeal from Prior and the slips for lbw but it was drifting miles down the legside. Strauss looks at Anderson but he stretches out his arms. Maiden. "When Chanderpaul lost his wicket you could have made a fortune off of folks wagering that WI would reach 250, writes Paul Ory. "Three cheers for Samuels and hats off to captain Sammy." Huzzah, Paul.
82nd over: West Indies 265-6 (Samuels 89, Sammy 71) Britsa does his usual jumping up and down on the spot routine before taking the new ball. His second is overpitched and Sammy enters the uncharted territory of the 70s with a punch-drive for four, more four than five o'clock. Each of his first four deliveries do not breech 77mph. He's obviously stiff after his earlier exertions, The fifth breaks 80mph and is better, angled in, full length and Samuels digs it out then block-drives the last ball.
83rd over: West Indies 273-6 (Samuels 89, Sammy 79) Anderson squares Sammy up, shaping to fend it down to short midwicket, he instead outside edges it for a four he knows nothing about to third man. The third is overpitched and Sammy repeats the trick, aiming for midwicket and getting four to third man. He's bowling beautifully now and finally calls in a third slip. Another shout when one nips back and raps Sammy on the back leg as he tried to leave it. They don't review as it looked high and would, indeed, have been umpire's call.
84th over: West Indies 278-6 (Samuels 90, Sammy 79) Anderson was having a right old chunter when his appeal was turned down, just shown on the replay. "He's ticking," says the knight (not the Knight). Four byes whistle down the leg side and Prior seems to hurt his hand in his attempt to stop the wayward dart. "Boiling point," says Bumble of the son of Burnley. "Put the kettle on." Broad bounces Sammy with his last ball of the over, the captain swaying away towards leg a la Geoffrey Boycott 32 years ago in his perspex visor.
85th over: West Indies 281-6 (Samuels 91, Sammy 81) Anderson is far from happy, particularly when Sammy has an almight swish, but the fireworks don't arrive on Bumble's schedule, unless you count his response to the swing and miss, jarring the batsman's hand on the handle. Sammy weathers the rage and takes two off the last ball with a powerful push to cover. Aleem Dar asks Strauss to muzzle Anderson at the end of the over. "Martin Duckworth should be publicly humiliated and punished for making us all remember the excruciating episode of Alan Partridge," writes Clare Davies, "where he was wearing horrid shiny 70s football shorts and kept 'popping out' in front of long-suffering PA Lynn." I think they were Alan Pascoe's rather than Alan Hansen's, Clare. Athletes' porno shots.
86th over: West Indies 285-6 (Samuels 94, Sammy 82) Now Broad has a face like thunder and cranking up the pace. It's Sammy who seems to be annoying them in particular, though. He plays an expansive drive and slices it over point for one. Anderson looks as though he has something more to add when he approaches the Windies captain after that shot.
87th over: West Indies 289-6 (Samuels 94, Sammy 86) Sammy leaves the ball outside off stump with an extravagant flourish. To Anderson that's more petrol on the flames. You have to give Sammy credit for winding him up so much and not backing down. Anderson then bowls two jaffas that don't get up too much, curving in then straightening off the pitch as Sammy reaches for them. But the last ball is overpitched, straining for the yorker, and Sammy, infuriatingly for Jimmy, plays a textbook off-drive for four.
88th over: West Indies 294-6 (Samuels 98, Sammy 86) "What was it the great Mike Selvey said earlier, Rob. I don't mean about the shorts," recalls Clare Davies. "But didn't he say it didn't matter about getting Shiv out, it was to get rid of the others. I fear he is, yet again, being proved prescient – if that means what I think of being wise before the event." He is wise and noble, our , Clare. Bresnan on for the tired Broad and a beautiful drive from Samuels to take him to 98 puts the partnership on 157, the highest ever in Tests at Trent Bridge for the sixth wicket.
89th over: West Indies 302-6 (Samuels 106, Sammy 87) Anderson to Samuels. They bring in the field to try to stall his century, keep him nervy overnight if possible but Anderson gets his line wrong, drifts on to leg and Samuels turns it to long leg for four to bring up his third Test ton. It's been a wonderful innings. If it was scratchy and a little skittish at first, he's blossomed since the middle of the last session. He gets four more off the last ball, not knowing much about it as it flew off the edge to third man for four. Up goes the 300.
90th over: West Indies 304-6 (Samuels 107, Sammy 88) Sammy takes one off the first ball and Samuels then plays and misses and admonishes himself. Bresnan, and Broad before him, have looked footsore since taking the new ball. Samuels has another nibble at a wide one, trying to cover drive and getting hold of it on the toe of the bat but gets right in line for the last three balls of the day, turning the final one to midwicket to be on strike tomorrow morning.
What a vital and, it has to be said, deserved partnership to close proceedings as this OBOer went wicketless. A hugely enjoyable day, Anderson bowling beautifully to begin with the Swann's wonderful ball to trap Chanderpaul. It was rounded off with grit and style from Sammy and Samuels. Robbie Smyth will be here again for tomorrow's first two sessions. Fresh shorts, please. Please join him at 10.45am. Thanks for your emails. Good night.